6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
