are you so shy because you have an std?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize