i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Randomize
