So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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