is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
