i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
