I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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