Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
