It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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