did you get engaged???
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
