im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
