the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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