Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
