so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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