Banned from zoo.
Again?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
