HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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