Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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