She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month