Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
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