im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Randomize
