So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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