I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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