I hate your face
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
