Nicole vs. Life
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
