You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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