do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
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So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
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I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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