woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
