let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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