Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
