Got a toothbrush?
This girl is more easily done than said...
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Drake has all the answers
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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