I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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