I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize