do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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