Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
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