I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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