Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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