Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
