Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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