I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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