Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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