She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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