when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
