You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
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