I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
