idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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