True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
There's even glitter on my cock...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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