is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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