he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
