May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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