She's JV to your varsity
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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