Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
